Sunday, November 2, 2014

Under Construction


I know, I know it's been forever since I posted a blog. I actually have drafted several posts over the past eight weeks but things move fast and as soon as I write something, it seems to change.  In the past eight weeks I went from rushing to get dressed from the shower, hiding my breasts from even my husband and kids, to texting pictures of my new *tits to just about anyone. I also went from being in fight mode (because now that I fought cancer I was going to fight the world, starting with the manager at Legoland over their predatory advertising) to feeling healthy and optimistic.   And finally, I went from hating my body to loving it.
I love a good analogy and thought of the following to describe my current breast situation. They are like a house under construction. My initial ones were a modest sized charming house that needed to be demolished because of asbestos. In it's place, a bigger house is being constructed by a great contractor. And while the blue prints look fantastic, the construction process includes some not so pretty phases.
So that's me - I'm under construction, or rather, reconstruction. I just had the last of six skin expansion appointments with the plastic surgeon. To backtrack...at the time of the mastectomy the plastic surgeon had placed  a silicone balloon expander under my skin. Then, once a week for the past six weeks I visited the plastic surgeon’s office where she filled a syringe with saline and then injected it in my breasts. It was a totally bizarre process. Picture filling a water balloon with water, because its pretty much the same thing.  Then for for the following few days after each expansion, I felt like I was wearing an extremely tight corset. It’s wasn’t so much painful as uncomfortable.
And now that the expansions are done, I get a six week break before my final reconstruction surgery...where I'll finally get my silicone implants. I've requested extra perky **tits that look like this picture of Kourtney Kardashian’s Because when it comes to issues of vanity, it is my American duty to keep up with the Kardashians.
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* totally appropriate word choice when talking about new awesome fake ones
** again, totally appropriate




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